Wyatt Earp & Doc Holliday: Gunfight at Lakeville

A Battle in the Tiger II with an IS-3 Ally


Map: Lakeville
Tank: Tiger II


Map opens with a T59 on my team TKing a Hummel. This sent the team into a flaming tailspin as the T59 says tersely, "he was in the way." I dismiss my own rage at the crime, and realize there's the Dalton Gang to contend with, and I only hoped the team wouldn't dissolve into a responsive TKing mess. Things managed to calm down. Top tier was 8: me, an IS-3, a 45P/A, Ferd & 2 T59s vs. two T32s, a KV-5, Tiger II & two T59s. Me and a single IS-3 go town with no others. I take upper road solo while the IS-3 heads bottom. I go into full defensive mindset at 1st building corner, as I realize we are too weak in the east to do much else. Most of the team has gone valley. With an opening TK and extremely weak east push, this looks like a loss in the making.

I face-off vs. one of the T32s, a KV-5 and a 3001P. T32 wisely hulls down, at far end of upper town road, only showing me his turret, and KV-5 does little effective besides snipe with weak cannon for the first four or five volleys, before finally rushing me. The 3001P snipes from beside the T32, but misses nearly every time.


I knew I had to take out the T32 quick, as I'm alone, and not sure the true number of enemies in this urbania, and his is the most worrisome gun. I ignore the other two tanks, and aim carefully at his commanders cupola with my Doc Holliday shotgun, AKA, the trusty 105. I land four consecutive rounds that damage the T32 nicely, as they surprisingly remove 15 to 20% hp with each shot. By the time the KV-5 decides to rush and bring encroachment, the T32 is down to 10% and I'm at 75% (the T32 bounced mostly off me -- I kept hull angled and angled turret btwn shots). Just before they rush, the 3001P exposes himself over the hilltop of the road, and I remove half his life.

As the KV-5 and 3001P make their run at me, the T32 is now scared and not exposing or shooting, and I have time to plant 3 shots into KV-5's front, taking about 1/3 hp or more. He fully flanks me, and I cannot ignore him, this causes the T32 to get brave and make the long run toward me as well -- I've pulled around the building entirely to fight the KV-5, and I ignore the 3001P completely. My full-flanked-fight with the KV-5 has the 4th round land into his side, setting him afire, and I'm happy to see his HP now tick-off well below 50% as I'm reloading. The T32 has now cleared the building corner, and is ready to join-in the feeding frenzy. All three continue to eat at my HP and damage modules, but the Tiger II, to quote from the movie, "Das Boot": "is incredible." It bounces many of their shots, keeping Doc Holliday in the fight, like some sort of undead, amazingly staying alive.


I gamble the KV-5 does not load HE as I might do in that tank, and his gun is therefore much less worrisome. The T32 then finds that I have decided to entirely ignore the wounded KV-5 and fully engage him instead. Now, at near point-blank range, he realizes that Doc Holliday ain't dying too easy, and is turning his shotgun on him again. Wide-eyed, he makes a useless retreat, giving me full perpendicular penetration into his front hull, and at 10% he now egresses life in this battle. I turn back to the KV-5, who sits nearly facing away from me, giving me his side and rear, and makes no other maneuver for the remainder of his life. At his 3%, I swear at Odin and Thor, as I bounce three shots off his flat, rear-side at dance-floor range, before the IS-3 comes sauntering from town bottom, and completes his death, but not before eating another kill point with the 3001P. Having used repair on engine, and med kit on my gunner, that ordeal is over.

Me and the IS-3 (who is at 100%, like some sort of Wyatt Earp, and who will finish the game with Top Gun, making me ever the sickly Doc Holliday), now head back down the lower town path. He has had a nice meal of lower tiers in the bottom of town, while I fought for my life, hacking-up lung, in town top. I am torn since I gravitate to defense, and the match is basically tied. As we are about halfway through town, the teams trade deaths. Two enemies have pushed the middle mountain road. Wyatt and Doc damage both, as defenders finish them. Now, I see a red diamond nearing our base, on our side of the town. I decide to turn back, and leave full eastern push to Wyatt Earp.

As I come out at the lake road, the VK3601 is fully lighted. He is bearing down on our last artillery, who survived the earlier, opening T59 TKing plague. Before I do him any harm, he is 100%, and oblivious to the 105, sawed-off about to befall him. I take careful aim and land two rounds into him, the first removing over 50% hp, and the 2nd finishing him.


Wyatt, I mean, the IS-3 has decided to take the upper east town road again, and I move down the lower toward enemy base. Our valley defenders have done their job, and now we are clearly ahead in kills. As I leave the final building, I alight the base defenders, and an artillery round disturbs the cosmos all around me. Now I am clearly below 1/4 health. Pale-faced and hacking horribly, Doc now sees the Hummel who added to his misery, and clears away the vast majority of his hp with a single shotgun blast consisting of a roll of quarters. He then is destroyed by the ever-mopping-up IS-3 Earp, coming from top road, and loved by the gods of the old west. The Dalton Gang Hummel, however, has brothers too: a Grille, is over the ridge from me. Amazingly, I damage him down to single digits without killing, but the IS-3 gets him as well, and continues to live his charmed life, with all hp intact.


I come into the circle as the IS-3 is leaving the far side of it, and as our valley allies kill the last Dalton T59. Now, only a brave, dressed-in-all-black, T29 remains of the enemy, making a final stand in the far northwest corner, but with full range over his flag. The IS-3 has hurt him. I come up, and land a round into his front, and place Wyatt Earp-IS-3 between the T29 and me. But the Dalton T29 can smell a kill with Doc Holliday, and manages to get around the IS-3 and take my HP now down to single digits. I land another round into him, as the IS-3 completes his Top Gun.


Confederate, Sniper, Steel Wall, 3,839 (x2) and 62k credits. Lots of fun as I only wanted to do my daily double, but as you can see from the vast amounts of text, I had fun, love the Tiger Royale, and as of 1/29/2012, love WoT still....


As the battle drew to a close, the IS-3 rolls up to me and says, "Doc, now that this is over, let's get you to that sanitorium, you're a good friend." And I replied, "go to hell...."

Wyatt Earp
Doc Holliday
Gunfight at the O.K. Corral 

SWTOR: Don't dart me bro! the Bounty Hunter's asplosive dart.

My Bounty Hunter trains in asplosive dart:

So glad my trainer is a hot blue chick.  Notice how she's acting all cool, looking away.  Love it when they play hard to get....

My first face-melting with the asplosive dart:

And here we see what happens when droids present their melty faces to my asplosive dart!

Yes, it ground their bones quite nicely....

And finally, listen to how girlishly ecstatic these Battlefield 3 players are when a bunch of SWTOR Bounty Hunters use asplosive darts in their game:

They became girls at the powa of Bounty Hunters' asplosive darts....

So, any more questions about a bounty hunter's asplosive dart?

I didn't think so....

(I just realized I called it "asplosive dart" every time in this post; for the sake of google crawler, I shall now rectify that:
explosive dart
dart explosive
the dart that's explosive
yea, dart, explosive, that one
don't explosive the dart
so baby dart to me explosive
explosive dart butt
the explosion dart of narnia
you think that's explosive dart you're breathing?
don't make me explosive dart. you wouldn't like me when I explosive dart
with great explosive dart comes much responsibility
robert downey explosive dart
lady gaga says, "i'm on the edge of explosive dart"
mama says go to explosive dart i says "no no no")

World of Tanks: The Maus

Die Machtig Maus....

Idk if I got that right.  I used babelfish.  I put in, "The Mighty Maus."

After playing WoT since beta -- from July 2010 -- and over 9k games, I finally got the Maus.  I see this as the end-game for me personally (me personally here).  So far, I have played only a few games.  This is not enough at all to really judge by, but I wanted to share my impressions of, firstly, the reactions of others:

Game 1: Map: Ensk: Died. Victory.  Damaged lotsa folks and contributed.  JDT got me.
Game 2: Map: Cliff: I went left by myself and met half the enemy team on our side of the mountain.  I held out long time vs. an IS-7, IS-4 and a cadre of others that could damage me, and with no one coming after many pings. Died. Called a noob by teammate. Defeat.
Game 3: Map: Prokhorovka: My client crashed.  I got back in the game and went down train tracks on outside to avoid arty. It was a good fight. Got a T30, et al.  Died. Ends in defeat.  At the point it was obvious we were going to lose, an E-100 on my team calls me idiot.  Why i asked, "you were afk and you went down middle." Me: "My f**king client crashed and I did NOT go down the middle!" (All I can figure is at the time he started watching me -- after he died -- I was passing their flag going for arty, and he simply assumed I went down the middle).
Game 4: Map: Malinovka: Stalemate that I finally broke by going solo down short side and raping their flank on guard.  Nearly died but didn't.  Steel Wall.  Got thanked by teammates who said great job.  I said, "only cuz we won and I obviously contributed to that end.  If not, I'd surely be a noob."

So far, it seems a massive amount of pressure is on me to some how magically win the battle for my team.  If for any reason we lose, and if for any reason I die EVEN if I face the entire enemy team by
myself, I'm a noob....

/qq right?

Otherwise, the Maus bounced Tiger II rounds like their coming from a Valentine (replayed my Valentine recently; my gosh at the lack of gun).  It really isn't as slow as I imagined, but it does feel like it's ice-skates -- something I've not noticed in any other vehicle).

I am still very raw in it, but despite the critics, I am having fun.  I do not like the pressure however, and that does detract somewhat.

The Coming Zombie Apocolypse

I think this is _the_ first ever post on the Internets about the coming zombie apocalypse.  I find it interesting that by typing "how to survive..." in the googles, it auto-completes: "...zombie apocalypse."

I have thoroughly enjoyed the game -- now with sequel -- Left 4 Dead.  I also recently started watching the AMC series: The Walking Dead.  However, I do have problems with the logic.

(Note: in Episode 2, I think it was, the hero gets inside an Abrams; I thought for sure he would wreak havoc on the great zombie horde that nearly ripped him apart; alas, it ends horrifically anti-climatically)

First, a Zombie Apocalypse _only_ makes sense _if_ the thing that turns people into zombies is airborne.  I simply have a problem with the logic behind The Walking Dead.  Ok, you can only get infected -- and consequently become a zombie -- if you are bitten or eat tainted food (apparently, getting scratched is ok).  However, all military bases have been overrun.  I mean, think about it: we can setup a military base in the middle of the hostile Middle East, and keep suicide bombers and other enemies out and a arms length -- or gun length -- but the military in The Walking Dead cannot stop a slow-moving zombie from just walking up and biting them? Ok, maybe it was food, but rogue humans have survived the infection, found each other, and gathered into small groups and are fully able to _not_ eat tainted food, but the military couldn't?...

Do not eat this corn!!!

Left 4 Dead also features "special" zombies: a jumpy hunter, an acid spitting lady, a big swollen "boomer," etc.    I actually like this.  I can see this.  The infection got started _by_ the military trying to make super soldiers, and it interacts with whatever strength the person has beforehand: the smoker, well, smoked.  Now, he smokes people.  The boomer liked chips and frosties, fat guy.  He now is filled with bile.  The hunter was obviously really good at parkour, and the tank was a musclehead....

I also realize that nothing really globally bad will happen without the Mayans having predicted, so, I next googled, "did the aztecs predict a zombie apocalypse" (note: aztecs and mayans are the exact same thing).  Turns out, it's sketchy at best, but it did turn up a page discussing how the CDC has issued preparedness info:

CDC Zombie Apocalypse Notice

Another thing I've noticed is the lack of zombie children, or zombie babies.  Idk.  I heard there are some here and there, but I can't think of any.

zomg!

I think producers do not have zombie infants cuz, the survivors will just punt them or something....

I do think one of the best possible clues to a real zombie apocalypse is/are vid games.  I think the govt. is secretly preparing kids to fight zombies.  It will not be the military that will save us.  It will armies of 12 year olds, who played L4D....

World of Tanks: Type 59 Getting Nerfed?

This upcoming in v7.1:

Presently, in the Russian patch notes for the T59 in v7.1:

Максимальный уровень боев танка «Type 59» увеличен на 1.

As http://babelfish.yahoo.com translates it:

The maximum level of combat of the tank “Of type 59” is increased by 1.

Basically, the Type 59 -- which has the same gun as the T-44 -- will find itself matched like the T-44, instead of enjoying the matching now of a tier 6.  Sorry T59 owners, fun is over.

But, this is just on the Russian servers so far, and just on the test.  It always starts in Russia....

SWTOR: Down, Set, Hutt!...

Star Wars The Old Republic: The Old Republic is our only hope.

Level three.  I remember 3rd grade.  This guy looks pretty held-back tho:

The cinematic/theatric quests really do tons and blows away all quest stories or quests period in all other games before this one -- wow looks like a joke now....

My understanding of the story thus far: I am a bounty hunter trying to get into a great hunt sponsored by a Hutt, named Nem'ro The Hutt -- a hunt, for a hutt, from a hut, what the hut?...

Nehow, my sponsor got killed, and I'm left with only his secretary (or something).  I must now prove to Nem'ro The Hutt that I can do the great hunt by doing "jobs" for him -- being his muscle.

I have decided to go light-side, ergo, good-side, and I do my best to make these choices, but they ain't always easy:

I feel like I'm back in school at times, "hrm, A! no no, B! wait, C!."  I know other bounty hunters also struggled with this light-side/dark-side stuff:

Apparently, that was the right, light, choice, cuz like, I had a "goodasm":

And then had to change my pants....

Also, also, also and stuff.  Meandered by the mailbox and see a number 'side it -- (queue Blues Clues: mail time!).  I had me some mails.  Turned out a lady in a quest I did yesterday, actually sent a thank you email.  Wow (not world of warcraft).  Never had that I don't think.  Tiny, but neat (twss):

Nem'ro The Hutt's digs:

Nice skylight:

Of course, there would be the seedy bar, and duh womin!...

I'm guessing they made the lewd women holographic to get by the censors.

Ah, the great Nem'ro himself:

His presence so sessy, it pushed me to level four!

He gives me stuff to do (aka, quests), that'll prove I can be in the great hunt.  Basically, go kill some poor people.  I head out and finally expand the map beyond THE noob area to just the noob area.

I did diez tho:

but a magic droid comes and brings me back to life:

I did end the day level 5, and a title: Fatkiddown: Hired Gun. 

I thot for sure it would say: Fatkiddown: Blue Crotch (obscure, but think about it -- hint, blue women).

SWTOR: You have been placed in a queue....

"In me?"